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Kubrick’s Napoleon project picked up by Del Toro

June 1, 2010

Film director Guillermo Del Toro, who recently stepped down from helming an adaptation of Tolkien’s The Hobbit has reportedly obtained the pre-production materials and script for Stanley Kubrick’s famously unfilmed Napoleon project. Though he spent many years writing and rewriting various scripts for the picture, Kubrick was never satisfied with the screenplay and never went into production with his Napoleon biopic.

Del Toro is said to be dropping the Napoleonic history angle and will re-imagine Napoleon and Josephine as a conjoined zombie twins, one a vampire and one a werewolf, who are caught in a labyrinth with a half-man, half-bull, half-zombie monster that inhabits nightmares and uses a chainsaw to kill every friday the 13 people who wake up that morning wearing hockey goalie masks and haven’t been able to cut their own hands off to free themselves from a marauding human centipede zombie werewolf that thinks it is a vampire but is actually a pubescent wizard with family issues and a nasty facial scar.

Studio insiders called the take “very new and fresh,” with Del Toro “really breaking new ground for the zombie, werewolf, vampire, nightmare-inhabiting mass-murder human centipede wizard genre.” One remarked anonymously that “it seems like lots of historians are kinda coming around to this view of Napoleon anyway.”

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From → culture, jests

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